


Daily Bugle Report: Getting the Story

by d0d0bird



Series: Marvel: Tales to Tantalize! [34]
Category: Marvel, Spider-Man - All Media Types
Genre: Alcoholic Jessica Jones, Bullying, Emasculation, Embarassment, Gen, Humiliation, Humor, Implied/Referenced Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Messy, Multi, POV Betty Brant, Peter Parker is a Good Bro, Sexual Shaming, Shoved Into Trash, Situational Humiliation, Social Humiliation, Teasing, Verbal Abuse, Verbal Humiliation, comic!Ned Leeds, wedgie, wedgies
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-18
Updated: 2020-05-18
Packaged: 2021-03-02 20:13:54
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,939
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24252643
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/d0d0bird/pseuds/d0d0bird
Summary: In the aftermath of Olivia Octavius's takeover of S.H.I.E.L.D., employees at The Daily Bugle are scrambling to get their stories out by deadline. Betty Brant and Ned Leeds pursue a lead with Jessica Jones, Peter Parker helps Sally Floyd get an exclusive, and Kat Farrell lands an interview with Olivia Octavius herself.
Relationships: Betty Brant/Ned Leeds
Series: Marvel: Tales to Tantalize! [34]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1507763
Comments: 2
Kudos: 4





	Daily Bugle Report: Getting the Story

“Sally! Where the hell is Sally?!”

“Irene, Jameson says he wants all our photos and videos of the incident on the website yesterday!”

“Tell him I’m working on it, damnit!”

“HAS ANYONE SEEN SALLY!?”

The Daily Bugle was in hysterics. Not 24 hours had passed since the news broke that S.H.I.E.L.D. was being dissolved.* The New York Bulletin had gotten the tip and published the story first, so Jameson was even more demanding than usual. He wanted as many stories and articles relating to the incident as possible to make up for missing that scoop.

*Due to the events of [Avengers: The Mighty](https://archiveofourown.org/works/24115987)

Jameson wasn’t even present in the office that day. He was with various politicians and other officials to get exclusive information. His tyrannical rule of the office was still potent though. His secretary Melita Garner was constantly conveying his demands. It was certainly more pleasant to hear coming from her, but that didn’t make the deadlines any more reasonable.

Reporters were running every which way, grabbing their supplies and rushing out the door or furiously typing away at their computers. Irene Merryweather, the Multimedia Producer for the Bugle, was hard at work taking all their footage and photos and publishing them on their website. She worked alongside numerous photojournalists, including the part-time Peter Parker.

Peter was an Empire State University student who worked as a photographer for the Bugle a few days a week. He was notably the only one to ever get pictures of Spider-Man, which all but assured him a place at the Bugle. Jameson would never let him know that though. He wanted him as scared as the others.

Peter was only the second least senior person in the office. Sally Floyd was a stern-looking intern working similar hours to Peter but shadowing reporters instead of providing photos. She also served as the unofficial assistant to all of the reporters, providing them with whatever they needed to get the story done. She had aspirations of being a reporter herself and often voiced her displeasure with the limitations they put on her.

“Where are you going, Kat?” Betty Brant asked Kat Farell.

The two women sat at desks directly facing one another. Kat had just gathered her things and gotten up to leave. Betty, knowing Kat wasn’t one to leave without a clear goal in mind, wanted to know what she was up to. After all, they both had aspirations for higher positions at the Bugle.

“I’m not obligated to tell you,” said Kat, adjusting her glasses, “but if you must know… I have an interview with Dr. Octavius.”

“You’re kidding me,” said Betty in disbelief.

“The warden owes me a favor,” smiled Kat back, “and apparently Dr. Octavius was more than willing to comply with the interview.”

“Good luck,” said Betty.

“I don’t need luck,” said Kat pointedly, walking out without even looking at Betty.

“...okay then,” muttered Betty under her breath.

“Um, excuse me?” said a man behind Betty, “Can you tell me where to find Mr. Jameson?”

“He’s out,” said Betty, spinning around in the chair, “You should speak to Ms. Garter over there if you want to leave a message for him or something.”

“Oh no,” said the man, “My name is Ned Leeds. I’m the new journalist.”

“Oh?” said Betty.

She didn’t know they were getting a new journalist. Maybe in the hysteria of the incident and subsequent deadline madness she had missed it. Ned was not an unhandsome man. He had a mess of brown-orange hair and a nervous look in his eyes. There was a certain earnestness to him.

“Yeah,” nodded Ned, “Uh, nice to meet you.”

“Likewise,” smiled Betty, standing and shaking Ned’s hand.

“So… Is there someone I should check in with or…?” asked Ned.

“Tell you what,” considered Betty, “Why don’t you jump right in?”

“Jump right in?”

“Yeah,” said Betty, “Everyone’s rushing to get stories and articles done right now anyway. No one’s going to be able to give you an orientation or anything. You might as well get to work finding stories too.”

“I, um…” admitted Ned uncomfortably, “I don’t even know where I’d start...”

 _Who admits to that?_ wondered Betty, _This guy is either a total idiot or trusting to fault._

“Come with me,” said Betty abruptly, standing up and gathering her things, “I have a lead. Let’s follow it.”

If nothing else, Betty wanted to know more about this new guy. She doubted he would try to undercut her or anything, so there was no harm in bringing him along.

 _Hell,_ thought Betty, _He might even turn out to be a half-decent journalist._

“What’s the lead?” asked Ned as they rushed out the door.

“Jessica Jones.”

Across the office, Peter watched carefully as the two departed.

“Hm…” he murmured.

 _I wonder if I should warn Jessica…_ he thought.

“PARKER!”

“Yes, Ms. Merryweather?”

“Where the hell are the photos of Octavius’s arrest?” she asked angrily, “If Kat really gets that interview we’re going to need those.”

“They should be one the office drive,” said Peter, “I saved them in my folder.”

“Good job,” she said.

Peter sighed with relief. He could never tell whether he was about to get berated around there or not. Luckily, Ms. Merrywheather was considerably more understanding than Jameson. That was an egregiously low bar though.

Sally sighed herself as she slumped into the chair next to Peter.

“Tired?” he asked.

“Worse,” she said, “Anxious.”

“Why’s that?”

“The journalists have all gone out to get their stories,” she said, “and of course none of them wanted me to tag along. They just wanted me to gather their things for them before they left.”

“That sounds rough,” frowned Peter, “I’m sorry.”

“Thanks.”

“Did you ever pitch that story idea you had?” asked Peter.

“You mean the Mutant Diaries idea?” asked Sally, “Because if so, yes. Jameson laughed me out of the room at first. Then when he found out I was serious he chewed me out for about 20 minutes straight.”

“He’s wrong,” said Peter, “That was a great idea. If you can, you should go ahead and do it for your blog or something.”

“Like anyone would read that,” scoffed Sally, “Plus, I don’t even have a mutant to interview. Even if I did, I doubt anyone would notice with all this S.H.I.E.L.D. stuff dominating the headlines.”

“...what if I could help?” asked Peter quietly, sitting next to Sally.

“Help how?”

“You know how I meet up with Spider-Man sometimes?” asked Peter, “To go over photos and stuff like that?”

“You think you could get me an interview with him?!” asked Sally excitedly.

“I don’t think so,” said Peter, certain Sally would figure him out if he did, “but I think he knows Angelica Jones.”

“Firestar?” realized Sally, “The Avenger?”

“The _mutant_ Avenger,” added Peter, “Even Jameson would have to publish an interview from an angle like that!”

“You’d get me that?” asked Sally excitedly, “Really?”

“Yes,” said Peter, “I want this interview to happen and get published as much as you do.”

“Then yeah!” said Sally in an excited whisper, “Let me know if you can get that!”

***

Kat heard the loud click of the deadbolt before the door swung open. Kat walked into the small room. It was occupied by only a single table with two chairs across from one another. In one of those chairs sat Dr. Olivia Octavius herself, wearing her prison uniform and looking bored.

“Dr. Octavius,” said Kat, offering a handshake, “Thank you for agreeing to meet with me.”

“Don’t thank me,” said Olivia in a squeaky voice, refusing the handshake, “I’m only doing this so I won’t be silenced.”

“Um, are you okay?” asked Kat.

“What do you mean?” asked Olivia, voice still high-pitched.

“Your voice…” said Kat.

Olivia crossed her arms in frustration and frowned as her face started to turn red.

“I do not wish to discuss that,” she squeaked.

It seemed like Dr. Octavius’s voice was stuck that way. Kat wondered why. She took out her microphone and placed it on the table, hitting record. She then took out a small notebook and pen and prepared to write.

“Very well,” said Kat, “You said you agreed to this interview so that you wouldn’t be silenced. Can you elaborate on that?”

“I can,” squeaked Olivia, “My pursuit of knowledge has always rubbed people the wrong way. The bullies in high school, my jealous peers in the scientific community, the bullies in college, S.H.I.E.L.D., the bullies in grad school… All of them. They want me to be locked away and silenced, but I won’t allow it.”

“You mentioned bullies multiple times,” pointed out Kat.

“Yes,” sighed Olivia, “Brutish bullies always target people like me.”

“Nerds?”

“GENIUSES!” shouted Olivia angrily, which sounded particularly silly in her high-pitched voice.

Hearing how ridiculous she sounded, Olivia blushed and meekly sunk into her chair.

“You believe geniuses are targeted by others?” asked Kat.

“Of course we are,” said Olivia, “Why do you think those Avengers came after me?”

“You don’t think it was because you took control over S.H.I.E.L.D., forced multiple people under mind control, and tried to launch a global system of satellite weapons to take over the world?”

“That wretched Hill was planning on doing basically the same thing,” insisted Olivia, “She was the only reason the mind control was even possible! Of course, she needed me to implement it.”

“So you are confirming that Hill ordered you to design collars capable of mind control?” asked Kat.

“Yes,” said Olivia, “but let’s stay on topic. Hill was just as much of a tyrant as me, but no one went after her. No one mocked her! No one belittled her! No one wedgied her so severely her diaphra-”

Olivia suddenly stopped herself, blushing and looking away.

“I’m sorry,” said Kat, holding back a smile, “What was that last one?”

“No one belittled her…” muttered Olivia.

“Is your voice like that because of a wedgie?”

“Maybe,” pouted Olivia indignantly.

“Is it…” asked Kat cautiously, “...still up there?”

“No,” grumbled Olivia, “They removed it before they incarcerated me.”

“They?” asked Kat, “You needed assistance removing the wedgie?”

“Let’s change the subject.”

“Oh my God,” realized Kat, “It was She-Hulk, wasn’t it? That must have been brutal.”

“Shut up!” squealed Olivia angrily.

“I can’t imagine a wedgie from She-Hulk,” said Kat, “How did it not split you in two?”

“I’ll have you know that I wear specially designed undergarments!” said Olivia indignantly, “They would never split me in two no matter how severe the wedgie was.”

“Are you speaking from experience?” asked Kat, “Exactly how many wedgies have you gotten in your lifetime, Dr. Octavius?”

“Enough!” shrieked Olivia, “I will not be demeaned like this! I am a scientific mastermind! I have seven doctorates!!!”

“You didn’t answer the question.”

“This interview is over!” screamed Olivia.

Kat got up, chuckling to herself as she picked up the microphone and walked out. An interview like that was certainly an exclusive. The political stuff about Hill was nice, but the embarrassing stuff would be the selling point. Readers ate that kind of stuff up. Kat couldn’t wait to publish it.

***

Sally checked her watch. This was when and where Peter said Angelica Jones would meet her. Sally felt a moment of hesitation. Maybe trusting Peter had been a mistake. That whole office was cutthroat at times. What were the chances that Peter could actually get her an interview with Firestar?

“Sally Floyd?”

 _Holy crap!_ thought Sally, _Pretty good, apparently! Keep it cool, Sally._

“Yes. Angelica Jones?” she said.

Peter had told Sally to go to the place where he always met to speak with Spider-Man: a rooftop in Manhattan obscured by several billboards. He said that it consistently assured privacy and that Angelica Jones would know to meet her there.

“That’s me,” said the woman, lowering her hood and letting down her red hair, “Pleased to meet you.”

“Likewise,” said Sally after an awkward pause, unsure of how to conduct herself, “Thank you for agreeing to meet with me.”

“Of course,” said Angelica, “Spider-Man assures me that you’re not like the others at the Bugle. I hope that’s true. Your publication doesn’t have a great track record with mutants.”

“I know,” admitted Sally, “Truth be told, I don’t even know if I’ll be able to publish this through them.”

The Bugle had rather infamously covered the Mutant Rights Movement led by Charles Xavier and Max Eisenhardt. The paper had regularly depicted the activists as genocidal terrorists and even printed stories falsely accusing Max Eisenhardt of violent attacks on nonmutants. Though the paper issued an apology for the slander decades later, it was hard for mutant activists to respect the paper after that.

“As long as you don’t misrepresent me,” said Angelica, “Did you want to begin?”

“Yes,” said Sally, fumbling for her recording mic and notepad, “One second…”

Angelica chuckled at the sight of the flustered Sally.

“Hello Ms. Jones,” said Sally after hitting record, “Thank you for agreeing to this interview.”

“My pleasure.”

“You’re something of a household name,” said Sally, “You helped save the world from the Phalanx. You’re the mutant Avenger. Did you want to talk a little about how that came to be?”

“I can’t say a lot due to agreements I signed with the Avengers,” said Angelica, “Even with S.H.I.E.L.D. gone, those are still binding.”

“What can you tell us?”

“That I was proud to be an Avenger,” said Angelica, “That since I developed these powers, I’ve wanted to find a way to use them for good. I thought S.H.I.E.L.D. could help me do that.”

“Did they?”

“In the end, no,” said Angelica, “Captain Rogers and I discovered the plans for S.H.I.E.L.D. to document mutants and put us in camps if necessary. That’s what got him charged with treason in the first place. We barely managed to escape the Triskelion.”

“So that’s how you first found out about the registry?”

“Yes,” nodded Angelica, “It was devastating. I had dedicated my life to their service. When I found out I was fighting on behalf of someone who wanted to round up people like me… I’m glad we found those documents when we did.”

“Were you present for the attack on the Triskelion?”

“No,” said Angelica, “I didn’t know if I’d have to go into hiding or something. No one knew how far S.H.I.E.L.D. would go with their plans for mutants. If S.H.I.E.L.D. hadn’t been dissolved, I couldn’t risk being so close to the incident.”

“Are you comfortable disclosing where you were at the time?”

“Yes,” said Angelica, “Professor Charles Xavier was kind enough to let me stay at his school in Stamford.”

“The X-Mansion!?” realized Sally, “What was it like suddenly living with other mutants?”

“Wonderful,” smiled Angelica, “I don’t know how to explain it, but even with other supers there’s his… look that we get as mutants. This fear that you’ll go nuclear at any moment.”

“And that’s something you experienced as an Avenger?”

“From some of them, yes,” said Angelica, “not from all of them.”

“And you didn’t experience that at the X-Mansion?”

“Not at all,” said Angelica fondly.

“Could you tell me more about what it’s like to live there?”

Angelica was more than happy to answer. The interview continued along that route, focusing on Angelica’s mutant experience. Sally was happy too. This was the exact kind of interviewing she wanted to be doing.

***

“There she is,” whispered Betty.

“Seriously?” asked Ned in disbelief, “Her?”

Betty and Ned sat sipping coffee across the street from a liquor store in Hell’s Kitchen. A disheveled-looking woman wearing sunglasses had just emerged from the store, bag of booze in hand.

“You think that’s bad,” scoffed Betty, “you should check out how Patsy Walker’s been doing these days.”

“Should we follow her?” asked Ned.

“Yes,” said Betty, “in a moment. We don’t want to confront her in broad daylight like this. She won’t give us anything. If we catch her in the lobby of her apartment or something though…”

“What the hell do you two want?”

Both Ned and Betty nearly leapt out of their seats in surprise. Jessica had crossed the street at the end of her block and circled back around, approaching Betty and Ned from behind.

“How… How did…?” stuttered Ned.

“Betty Brant from the Daily Bugle,” noted Jessica, “I doubt you're just sitting across the street from a shitty liquor store for fun. What do you want?”

“To the point,” smiled Betty, “I like it. What can you tell us about the incident at the Triskelion?”

“No,” said Jessica, turning and walking away.

“Wait!” yelled Ned, running up to her.

“Ned, don’t-!” began Betty, but Ned had already ran in front of Jessica and cut her off.

“You have 5 seconds to get out of my way before I shove that weird microphone of yours up your ass,” said Jessica.

“Please,” said Ned, “You have to get your side of the story out there! Come on, you’re a hero, aren’t you?”

Jessica stared blankly at Ned for a moment.

“You know this is why no one will have sex with you,” said Jessica.

“How did you kn-? I’m not-! But-!” sputtered Ned.

“Well said,” replied Jessica.

Jessica then grabbed either of Ned’s shoulders, lifted him clear off the ground, turned to the nearest trash can, and shoved him into it butt first. He began to protest, but she pushed him down farther into the can before kicking it over and walking away. Several nearby people laughed at the sight. Betty cringed in empathy as she watched Ned crawl out of the can, covered in filth. Then she glared at Jessica, who was walking away.

“Jessica Jones!” shouted Betty, “What do you have to say about the wedgie eye witnesses said She-Hulk gave you?”

Jessica stopped where she was, not even turning around. Several bystanders chuckled.

“Is it true that you needed assistance to remove it?” asked Betty loudly, “Or that you were unable to walk properly for several hours afterward?”

Jessica turned back to face Betty. Upon seeing Jessica’s face, Betty immediately regretted what she had said. Jessica was walking over to her fast and with fury in her eyes. Then she stopped and eyed Ned, grinning.

“No, wait!” pled Betty.

Jessica walked over to Ned, who was still on his hands and knees, and reached into the back of his pants. She tightly gripped the waistband of his sky blue boxers underhanded with both fists. Ned’s eyes widened in terror. Jessica smirked at Betty.

“Just remember,” said Jessica to Betsy, “I’m doing this because _you_ pissed me off.”

The sound of shredding fabric and Ned’s screams carried down the streets.

***

“Hey!” said Peter excitedly as he saw Sally walk in, “How did it go?”

“Great!” smiled Sally, “Thank you so much, Peter! She’s so cool!”

“You have your pitch ready?” he asked.

“Oh no,” dismissed Sally, “I don’t have enough to work with yet.”

“What do you mean?”

“I’m going to interview more mutants,” she said, “get their stories too. Angelica offered to help. Once I have enough of that, then I’ll start looking for a way to get it published.”

“Sounds like you know what you’re doing,” said Peter.

“That’s because I do,” smirked Sally.

“Parker!” yelled Irene, “Get over here!”

“Yes, ma’am!”

Kat was sitting with Melita, who was going over Kat’s notes while listening to the audio recording. Even though her official title was Jameson’s secretary, he offloaded so many of his duties on her that she often functioned as something of an assistant editor-in-chief.

“Well done, Kat!” said Melita, “How soon can you get something written up?”

“I’ll have it to you within the hour.”

“Sounds good. Have you- What the…?”

Everyone’s attention turned to the front of the office, where Betty was helping Ned into the room with his arm draped over her shoulder. Ned’s was wincing with every step. They stopped when they realized everyone in the office was looking at them.

“Uh…” muttered Betty, “Hi everyone. This is Ned Leeds. He’s our new hire.”

“Hi Ned,” mumbled several workers throughout the office.

“Hi everyone,” said Ned in a squeaky voice before clearing his throat and saying in a much lower pitch, “Nice to meet all of you.”

“Are you injured?

“What’s wrong with your voice?” asked Sally.

“Nothing,” squeaked Ned before saying in a low voice, “Nothing is wrong.”

“You know it’s funny,” mused Kat, “Dr. Octavius sounded just like that. Apparently it was a side effect of a monster wedgie.”

Several people in the room snickered.

“No, no,” insisted Betty, “Ned just sustained a minor injury while we were out, that’s all.”

“An injury?” inquired Melita, “Ned, if that’s true you’re going to have to file a report with-”

“That won’t be necessary,” said Ned abruptly, careful to keep his voice low.

“No,” said Melita, “That wasn’t a request. If you really suffered an injury on the job, it’s our policy that you have to-”

“It wasn’t really an injury per say,” said Betty, “I might have misspoken.”

“It was a wedgie,” smirked Kat, “Wasn’t it?”

Ned bit his lip in embarrassment as all of his new coworkers chuckled at the state Jessica’s wedgie had left him in.

“No,” insisted Ned, “It was nothing like that. Everyone can return to what they were doing. I’m just going to head over to my desk now...”

Ned then moved himself off of Betty and stood up straight. He began to walk forward but his legs were moving in an outward motion and he was still grunting and wincing with every step. The room continued to snicker.

“Hey!” protested Betty, “Ned took a risk. You should all respect that. It’s something we could use more of in this office. Furthermore-”

“Oh my God!” laughed Kat as Ned walked by, “His underwear is all stretched out.”

“WHAT!?!” yelped Ned, “How did you see!? I thought I had tucked it all away…”

“I didn’t,” sneered Kat.

Ned turned bright red as the office began to laugh even louder. He had tipped his hand. They all knew now.

“Hey, new guy!” shouted one of them, “You think you’ll get a swirly working on your next story?”

“What kind of loser lets himself get pushed around like that?” asked another.

Ned couldn’t take it anymore. He rushed back out of the room, but the sight of him waddling bowlegged at running speed only earned more laughter. Betty, now embarrassed herself, slowly walked over to her desk and took a seat.

“So,” said Kat, sitting at her own desk across from Betty, “You get anything good for that wedgie?”

“No,” grumbled Betty.

“Don’t worry about it,” said Kat, “It happens.”

“You’re being uncharacteristically assuring,” noted Betty.

“I’m in a good mood,” shrugged Kat, “Shame you had to spend the day with that loser new guy.”

“Hey!” said Betty angrily, “He’s not a loser!”

Kat raised an eyebrow at Betty.

“Okay, he is,” admitted Betty, “but he’s earnest too. I think he’s… endearing.”

“You and your fixer uppers,” muttered Kat, “You gonna ask him out or is it going to go nowhere like your crush on Peter?”

“Sh!!” hushed Betty abruptly, looking around to make sure no one had heard that, “Where did you get that idea?”

Kat just chuckled and began to write her article.

**Author's Note:**

> J. Jonah Jameson will always be off-page because he stresses me out too much to even write him


End file.
